Thursday, January 23, 2014

The Silent Warriors - Jie Mei @ Wedding

First of all, I'm glad to know that the previous entry helped some friends (in some ways) in wedding planning! Thought I can share more on my experience from other aspects of wedding planning, if anyone is keen to read. =) Shall break it up into several entries else it will take forever to read. haha

As the title says, this entry is dedicated to my awesome possum jiemeis! Jiemeis are the girls who contribute a universe to only shine below the lime light. They are way busier than the bride on AD, but they are never recognition-demanding. Though not blood related, their love and assistance rendered does not fall far behind from my two biological sisters. I'm a lucky bird to have them all. The girls had heard of each other as we grow up, but had never hangout. Despite the lack of bonding sessions, they actually clicked like they knew each other for life! Guess 'birds of a feather flock together' haha! All of them shares similar personality traits - contain Rah Rah cells in them, outgoing and friendly in general (unless provoked. They will attack, scratch and kill. Nah just kidding!). 

What went missing in the previous "6 Tips to afford a wedding at right depth of your pocket" entry was the Jie Mei Management. I know we have tons of friends in the "Jie Mei waiting List" but hey, you won't need 10 pairs of hands on the actual day, really. I had 5 Jiemeis for my wedding as I was kind of shy to 'trouble' more friends. Thinking back, I thought I could do with lesser, but well the 5s are a joyful bunch so no regrets. 

The busiest time for Jie Mei usually lies in the morning. Not sure if anyone has broken down the task lists for Jiemei before but here goes the one that I compiled with things my jiemeis had done:

Disclaimer: the table below serves as a rough guide based on what took place during my wedding. May differ with individuals/preferences

Jie Mei Guide
*Time listed is an estimate, may differ for different couples*

The extent that the girls went can be summarized as such: waking up to our 吉时(auspicious time), be ever so spontaneous during gate crashing, look out for any possible make-up smudge on the bride, assist in gowns changing (sound easy, keyword: sound) or to carry a supermarket in the handbag that consist of items from straws to slippers. You name it, she may have it. What's more, some may even go under your dress to help with the can-can. You need close pals who really don't mind burning their energy for your yet don't exactly mind doing so. At the same time, I felt 'Paiseh' the whole day to trouble them, though they kept repeating that it didn't matter. Such wonderful friends *Touched*

The amount of people you need during tea ceremony is a good gauge (usually 4 to 5 is good enough) to the number of Jiemei you need. Having compact size Jiemei troop allows for more communications, lesser arguments or bickers, and higher appreciation values! Why so? Cuz the bride can give slightly bigger Ang pow (as compared to giving 8 jiemeis of relatively smaller ones) to thank them for all the hard work that they put through without hesitations. 

So, before a BTB starts engaging 15 bridesmaids, you may want to consider getting the top few girls that pop up to your mind, those whom you are most comfortable with, that you need not be pretentious with. Trust me, they will see your most beautiful and unglam moments in your life all on your wedding day. haha! Don't mistake the slim selection as breaking of a friendship, as it all boils down to nothing but practicality and comfort level. Who knows, some friends may prefer watching you from afar and give her blessings in a mellow manner. Need to balance the view point and not skewed unnecessarily, your friends still love you nevertheless, vice versa.

On a side note, don't get me wrong either. You may still get more girls as your jie mei if you really wish to include all the peeps in your clique. There is no 'right or wrong' in a wedding planning, just preferences and comfort level. So don't fret over it too much!:)

Coincidentally, my Jie Mei each represent a phase in life:
Maid of Honour, Krys! - known since 5.Went to same primary and secondary school. No one knows me more than her=P
Dawn - Secondary School CCA mate from symphonic band. Reeds instrument ftw!

Ethel a.k.a. Mure - Soul mate from Polytechnic (coincidentally, she is a reed instrument player too!)

 Jac - Colleague since first job. Lifetime events pal (who share same Chinese name as me!)

BCHL! - One of the dearest from TPS. Part of HCJS=)
These lovelies even planned for a surprise Hen's Party. It was quite epic and I must say, very well planned! They left no room for suspicion and I was really caught off guard at the hotel. Well,  I'll document that in separate post cuz this gets a little too lengthy. More photos of the cheeky bunch!

Biological sisters!

I looked damn tired for smiling 6 hours straight, but the rest look super refreshed! *thumb up

Looking forward to more outings that will follow suit, and once again, THANK YOU MY 特务姐妹**!

**origin of name derivation: They didn't have each other's numbers at the initial phase of whatsapp group chat. Hence they called themselves secret agents when so many numbers emerged, and addressed each other as agent XXXX - last 4 digits of their cell number. How creative!